Discussing a prenuptial agreement with your partner can be challenging. Will they think you are already planning for a divorce? Will they start questioning your commitment?
A noteworthy percentage of Americans have reported being open to the idea of a prenup, but often avoid the conversation. In turn, some end up getting married without signing one. So, how can you initiate the prenup conversation without implying a lack of trust or faith in the longevity of the marriage?
Start the conversation early
Your fiancé may not view a prenup as collaborative when you start the conversation a few weeks before the wedding. Besides, they may feel pressured into signing it. Signing a prenup immediately before the wedding can also make it unenforceable, as it can create room for claims of duress.
You and your partner should have enough time to learn more about a prenup, openly discuss your assets and debts, decide which assets you will keep as separate property, agree on how you would handle assets and debts in case of a divorce and so forth.
If you are not yet engaged, consider starting the conversation immediately after discussing a serious long-term commitment. If you are already engaged, it helps to have the conversation 6 to 2 months before the wedding.
Frame the conversation positively
During the conversation, let your partner know you are committed to making the marriage work. You are using the prenup as a tool for financial transparency.
Let them know how the agreement protects both of you and ensures fairness. So, use “we” language. Additionally, inform them that they can freely express their concerns and can take time before responding.
A prenup conversation can be healthy or unhealthy. You want to be careful about how you initiate the conversation. Get more information about this agreement to make informed decisions from the beginning.