While becoming a parent is an exciting time for a married couple, raising a child is by no means easy. Parents are bound to have disagreements about how their children should be raised, which school they attend, what hobbies they partake in and who their friends are.
Nonetheless, when disputes arise, parents should avoid undermining one another. What are some common examples of parents undermining one another?
Keeping secrets
Secrets of any kind have the potential to cause friction between married couples. Of course, there may be occasions where fun secrets are a positive- like keeping a surprise birthday a secret. However, for the most part, secrets are unwelcome.
For example, a parent telling their child not to inform the other parent that they had been up late at night emailing a friend is bound to cause tension should it come to light.
Changing punishments
Parents may have different ideas about styles of discipline. However, in joint parenting, it’s important that parents show a united front. For example, a child may have been prohibited by one parent from playing video games until their homework is finished. If the other parent then says, “Oh, go ahead and play your video games”, then this is undermining. While this may not sound like a serious issue, repeated instances of this can turn the child against the parent who is trying to enforce discipline and ensure that homework is completed.
When parents undermine one another, this can put tremendous strain on the marriage. Ultimately, it could end up in a divorce. Those same parenting differences could cause even more serious issues post-divorce. If you’re facing this type of scenario, it may benefit you to seek legal guidance.